Not quite

We had warm weather last week. The snow was melting yesterday. There were puddles everywhere. I saw a brown patch on the front of the apartment across the street. I thought it was sand. I got excited when I realized that it was actually dried, withered grass.

But wait, no, it is not quite spring yet. It is cold again today. The puddles have turned into ice once again. And although the ice was covered with fresh snow, the sidewalks have become slippery again.

She was laid to rest

We all attended Ate Alice’s funeral service. Fr. Dado gave a beautiful service. My niece A read the first reading. Kay, Connie’s daughter, did the second reading. Sis and I delivered our eulogies to Ate Alice. My voice started to crack when I went up there to read my piece (my February 26th entry which I revised). Although I managed not to break down in tears, I did stop a few times to get my unbroken voice back. Later, a few people said that our eulogies were very encouraging and uplifting.

Kuya Nestor, his 2 boys and Kay were in tears. Before the coffin was closed, Nanay Ayo and Connie wailed. “Wala na si ditse (mo)!” It was so heartbreaking. My kids watched in awe. This was the first time that somebody very close to us died. I don’t think that any of these has sunk in their young minds yet. My first experience of death in the family was when I was 10 – when my paternal grandfather died. I don’t remember crying.

This song was sung during the lamay:

Mahiwaga ang buhay ng tao. (Life is indeed a mystery.)
Ang bukas ay ‘di natin piho. (We don’t know what life has in store for us. We don’t know what will happen tomorrow. We could be gone tomorrow.)
At manalig lagi sana tayo. Ang Diyos siyang pag-asa ng mundo.

Pag-ibig sa ating kapwa tao. At laging magmahalan tayo. ‘Yan ang lunas at ligaya at pag-asa ng bawa't kaluluwa. ‘Yan ang hiwaga ng buhay ng tao.

Why does it sometimes take the death of a loved one to realize the pain we have caused each other? After the funeral service, I told R, we better show our love now for each other while we’re still both here. Let’s not fight anymore. You don’t want to cry and be sorry when I’m gone.

A trip to the ER

RC had a tummy ache after breakfast. He wasn’t able to go to school. He was in bed the whole morning. He felt better after 12:00 noon and I made him have some lunch. Then he started to have a tummy ache again. He was crying from pain and I told him that I should probably bring him to the doctor. “No,” he said and he cried some more.

Towards the evening, he got up from bed and lay on the couch in my workstation. He said that his tummy hurt whenever he got up and moved. And he pointed to the left side of his stomach where it hurt. I was worried that it could be his appendix. I told him that we’d have to go to the hospital and have him checked. He cried and said that he didn’t want to go to the hospital. I asked him why. “Are they going to cut me?” he asked. My poor child! After the 2 health scares that we encountered lately, first, that of Ate Alice, and then that of Tito F, he must have thought that going to the hospital meant having surgery.

I assured him that the doctor was just going to listen to his tummy and check what’s going on in there. And yet in the back of my mind, if it were appendicitis, then he would need an operation. I would have lied to my child. I then persuaded him more by reminding him that Christmas that I had to bring RG to the emergency room. RG had a tummy ache as well and couldn’t eat. He was probably 12 then and I was worried. It turned out that it was just spasms and we were sent home.

RC and I went to the ER and were asked some questions. What did he have for lunch? Where exactly does it hurt? When did you have a bowel movement? What color was it? Did it hurt when you pee?

When the papers were all filled out, we were sent to a room. A nurse came and said that there was only one doctor on duty that night and there were five patients before us. It could be a bit of a wait. RC lay on the bed while I sat on the chair. After a little while, he experienced pain again. But then it subsided. After a few minutes, I saw him smiling. He was feeling better. We waited for the doctor anyway.

I was so tired. I fell asleep on the chair. After 2 ½ hours I was awoken when the lights were turned on and the doctor came in. He checked RC and asked more questions. He took a urine sample to make sure that it wasn’t a urine infection. It wasn’t and he gave RC a clean bill of health. He advised RC to drink lots of fluid.

She was loved

I went with sis to Ate Alice’s viewing (lamay). R, RC, RK and my niece A went as well. RG wasn’t able to come because he was at a friend’s place recording an audition piece for the Honour Band. A lot of people came. The group from the Couples for Christ-Handmaids, which Ate Alice was a member of, came. The girls from JMJ Fashions, were she worked as a supervisor, were also there. The girls were in tears. Mama told me that when their boss announced on Monday that Ate Alice was gone, the girls cried uncontrollably and they were sent home because they could no longer work. Nanay Ayo, Connie, and Kuya Nestor were also in tears. The chapel was full. You could tell how much Ate Alice was loved.

Please be careful with your heart

My brother-in-law, F, had a triple by-pass surgery on Friday, February 25. Imagine the worry of sis and F after what happened to Ate Alice. F had 3 arteries that were clogged. This was caused by fatty deposits that built up in his arteries over the course of many years. This is why exercising is so important – to burn this fat.

F’s open heart surgery was carried out under general anesthesia – total unconsciousness. The first thing that the surgeon did was to open his chest, from just below the neck to the middle of the upper body. That must be about a foot long. Then he cut (sawed) the breastbone (sternum). Ouch! To open his heart and operate inside it, they needed to stop his heart. So he was attached to a heart-lung machine to pump and oxygenate his blood during surgery. Meanwhile, the surgeon took a blood vessel from his leg and sewed it to bridge over (bypass) the blockage. The surgeon repaired three of his arteries. Hence, it is called a triple bypass.

After the operation, the heart-lung machine was slowed down and F’s newly repaired heart started beating and getting stronger and the machine was then turned off. He was then attached to a pacemaker to regulate his heartbeats.

A couple of days after the surgery, F was encouraged to walk around in the hospital.

When R and Kumpareng Rodel visited him, the latter wanted to see F’s scar. R walked out of the room. He didn’t want to see the scar. Mahina talaga ang loob ni R. When Rodel saw his scar, he almost fainted. R called a nurse to attend to Rodel. Nahilo, namutla at nagdilim ang paningin. He wasn’t expecting that F’s scar would be that big. For sure, he saw his wife’s C-section scar. But that was nothing compared to F’s. Also, R noticed that at 39 years of age, F was the youngest heart patient in the second floor of the hospital.

Here’s something else that’s interesting. Sis has observed that most of the heart patients were males. She asked the nurse if it’s only mostly men that get heart diseases. The nurse replied, “No. It’s just that men are babies. They complain when they feel any kind of pain. While women are used to suffering in silence. If ever they get a heart disease, it gets untreated. They suffer heart attacks and die.” Dedo na agad. (What does this tell us women?)

I commented to sis, “That’s true. We women feel pain regularly, for instance, menstrual cramps. We get so used to it that we don’t complain.” Imagine if men get menstrual cramps, they’d probably be at the doctor’s every month. And I guess, we, women, better get those chest pains checked. As well as other aches such as chronic headaches, fatigues, back pains, etc.

F is back home now recuperating. He will have to take it easy for a while. He has to wait 6 weeks before he could drive again and do the usual chores that he does.